Remember O'Brien and "The Cock Sucking Blues"? He continues to write prolifically and I continue to edit his books. Out of all the writers I edit, he is just pushing the most buttons. He was writing for his campus magazine: The Journal and meeting a lot of barriers. Especially with regards to his Legal Ways to Get High
series. Which faced a lot of flak from half the staff who wanted him to ridicule users and the other concerned that this was advocating usage, rather than explaining. Anyhow he burned some bridges after the last installment was rejected. Because of the positive feedback that we got off of this website, he would like me to post this rejected installment of the series. Feedback is always welcome and he can be reached through firstname.lastname@example.org
[/url] . "It is with mixed feelings to note that we have sold out of "Blues", thanks to all those who supported me through our endeavour"-James O'Brien
LEGAL WAYS TO GET HIGH
Episode 6: Constipation and the Fecal-based Opiate
by James C. O'Brien
A little known method to achieve a mild drunken state is through prolonged constipation. That is, going without a bowel movement for up to 5 days. The science being that fecal matter which would normally have exited the colon remains stagnant, blocking passage as more feces is past down from the stomach. Like a traffic jam, the line simply gets longer as the sigmoid colon congests. The feces is absorbed into the membranes of the splenic flexure which carries into the bloodstream as a mild poison. The poison itself produces intense waves of euphoria and hallucinations likened to opium. A constipation high lasts up to 4 hours, in which it is advised that you line your floors with plastic and not wear your "Sunday Best"
In the Western world, constipation highs are relegated to a fringe minority, considering the ordeal that one must go through to achieve said effect, it has somehow never caught on. Yet National Medical Reports have noted an uprise in usage in various "sub-slum regions". Attributed to substance addicts who are unable to get their fix.
The United States congress has declared constipation highs or ‘fecal-based opiates' as an official illegal substance in 1943, one of a handful of countries to recognize the narcotic potentiality of the process. In Canada, a fringe group of doctors and drug councillors are fighting for similar legislation to ban "fecal based opiates". Some schools have even taught rehab counsellors and nurses how to spot someone trying to reach a constipation high, tell tale signs include crossed legs and a strange smile on a flushed face.
Doctors caution against intentional constipation, pointing out how traumatic it proves to the lower intestines and could lead to fatal hemorrhaging, blood disease and with prolonged usage, colonic cancers.
However impoverished substance addicts and substance users have developed an alternate, more direct route to a constipation high. The process involves transplanting excrement into a basin of water. Let the feces dissolve into the water for approximately two hours. It is critical that you don't let the feces dissolve anymore than two hours because the concentration will be higher and could cause an overdose. Draw up some of the water into a syringe and inject into bloodstream.
Since the ‘science' of fecal based opiates is relatively unknown, it is unsure what concentration of the substance could cause potential over dosage, making it necessary to emphasize caution when allowing it to dissolve within the basin. The only user I was able to meet recommended two hours but even she was unsure about the percentage rates "or any other specifics". Sub techniques have developed around shooting up fecal based opiates. One such involves boiling down the basin water (or "broth") in a spoon with some lint and taking it into the needle, to concentrate the dosage. The user has informed me that this method creates identical results to the "constipation method".
A more common form of fecal based opiate usage is in lacing other, more popular drugs with the substance. Marijuana and cocaine are known to be up to 30% (per gramme) fecal based. The reason for lacing these drugs is to dilute the product. Diluting the product allows the dealer to stretch out his inventory. For example, it is more cost effective to dilute a pound of cocaine by lacing it with other, cheaper substances, so that the product is 50%* cocaine, 50% filler. This would mean that one pound of cocaine can be sold as two pounds. The mark up with the dilution or ‘lacing' of product equals higer profits to said dealer. Similar practices are achieved via hot dogs and left-over or reject meats from slaughterhouse beasts.
Given the low cost, lacing with fecal based opiates is widely practised, yet seldom preached. Dealers have found that clients would be put off knowing that what they are buying and consuming has a percentage of feces contained therein. Dealers usually find the subject of lacing to be taboo in the first place, given the hostile relationship between dealer and buyer, bringing up lacing is inadvisable due to potential arguments about product pricing.
*these are arbitrary figures, the author is unaware of the actual average percentage of the cocaine sold locally. Further more, the author must stress that even though injecting your veins with excremate is legal, consumption of cocaine, opium and/or marijuana is still illegal and subject to national narcotics law.